Two-Meme Tuesday

I was tagged forever ago by Val, who is an amazing mom to her five kids.  I don’t know how she has time to eat let alone blog.  Anyway, here goes:

What I was doing 10 years ago:
I was just finishing up the school year (as the teacher, not a student) with the most evil group of seventh-graders ever to plague the halls of a government school.  My guess is most of them are in jail now.  It was also around this time that I was called to be the Relief Society president of an inner city branch.  Quite the growth experience.  I was a mother of one, and suffering from the worst sleep deprivation of my life.  In retrospect, I was also probably suffering from post-partum depression, but I think a lot of that was due to the sleep deprivation that had been going on for seven+ months.

5 things on my to-do list today:
1. Mop my floors.
2. Call my visiting teaching companion and figure out what we’re doing this month (yes, nothing like putting it off until the end of the month).
3.  Look to see if the primary handbook is online and read it, since I was called into the primary presidency but nobody gave me the books to go with the calling and I’ve never served in primary before so I have no idea what I’m doing. 
4. De-clutter the kitchen counters (this is an ongoing, perpetual thing).
5. Go to the grocery store.
6. I know, this is more than five, but I really need to finish up the thank you notes from the shower gifts and help I got moving which, as we know, was all over a month ago now.  Bad, bad me.
7. Print out the letter to Quinn’s birthmother and send it, along with the pictures I already printed out, to the agency so they can send it on.
8. Call the lady who runs the town book club and see if they’ll let me join.

Things I would do if I were a billionaire:
1. Establish a scholarship fund for underprivileged kids who are willing to work hard to get a good education.  Sorry, but I’m not funding anyone who just wants to coast through to get a diploma that will then devalue the diplomas of those who worked their fannies off.  I think a strong work ethic needs to be fostered and rewarded, and the attitude of entitled laziness needs to be choked off.
2. Put all of my children through college
3.  Hire a landscape service to fix up our four acres the way I want it, and then maintain it.
4.  I would have the most comprehensive food/supply storage imaginable.
5.  Pay off my house.
6. Send all of the kids from Quinn’s province to school.
7. Build an actual public library in my town.

Bad habits:
1. Blog reading/writing (though I’m sorely behind on the reading).
2. Sugar
3. Re-reading the Twilight books when there are so many others I could be/should be reading.
4. Procrastination

Places I’ve lived:
1. Maine
2. Utah
3. Several areas within my current top-secret location (Dick Cheney says “hi”).

5 jobs I’ve had:
1. Babysitting
2. Waitress
3. Research assistant
4. Government school teacher
5. Newspaper reporter/photographer/&, finally, editor.

Today, my sister tagged me to do this other meme:

Favorite Person Outside Family:
Now how do you choose one without offending a bunch of others?  Geesh.  But I’d have to go with my college roommate/BF R~.  We’ve been friends for, what?  18 years now?  She is my sounding board, my therapy, and the one person who has really heard the (I’m sure painful) blow-by-blow of everything that has gone on in my life the past few months.

Quirks about me:
I only use Pentel RSVP pens.  I only sign my name in black.

How would the person who loves you most describe you in 10 words or less:
Beautiful, smart, spiritual, witty, honest, snarky, humble, frugal, compassionate, conservative 
(isn’t he just great?!?)

Any regrets in life:
Not getting all of the thank you cards sent out after my wedding.  I know!  Tacky and rude, rude, rude.  I actually found some of them recently, written and addressed and everything, but for some reason I never got them sent.  What is up with that?!?  I suppose now, almost 12 years later, it would be rude to send them?

Favorite charity/cause: My church.  Most people don’t realize just how much the church does, worldwide, regardless of the religious affiliation of those in need.

Favorite Blog recently: Like I could pick just one.

Something you can’t get enough of: Sugar and Edward Cullen

Worst job I ever had: I can’t think of any of my jobs that were that bad, so I guess I’d have to go with waitressing.  Or teaching seventh-grade devil spawn.

Worst job you would pay NOT to have: I would not want to be the guy who cleans septic tanks.

Favorite bible verse:
John 14: 27

  27 aPeace I leave with you, my bpeace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be ctroubled, neither let it be afraid.

Guilty pleasure: Oatmeal cookie dough, chocolate croissants, any kind of baked good or dough/batter that doesn’t have a lot of egg or dairy in it (I have mastered egg-free cookies).  Oh, and my homemade fudge.  Yum!

Got any confessions: I totally knew how to manipulate my parents into letting us keep the stray dog our friend found.  They had that dog for 19 years or some unusually long time.

If you HAD to spend $1000 on yourself, how would you spend it?
I would get one of those sleep number beds because McH and I have very different sleeping surface needs and our current arrangement isn’t the best.  Wait, $1000 isn’t enough for one of those sleep number beds.  Okay then, I’d get key pieces of this bedding and at least our bed would look nicer, even if still isn’t comfortable for both of us.

Favorite thing about your house:
The four acres on which it sits and all of the sunlight that we get in the house.  I LOVE light.

Least favorite thing about your house:
The bedrooms are smaller than I’d like (though not tiny by any stretch — I’m just being whiny).

One thing you are good at:
Making people spew beverages out their nose onto their computer keyboards.  Or so I’ve been told.

One thing you would change about your circumstances:
I’d live closer to friends and family.  Shocker, no? 

Who would you like to meet some day?:

What makes you feel sexy:
My dashingly handsome husband.

Who is your real life hero?:
My dashingly handsome husband.  Actually, different people have been my hero at different times.  My mother, my friend R~, my friend M~, my many friends from church back home who helped me clean the house and brought in food when we were moving . . . etc.

What is the hardest part about your job?:
I’m a stay-at-home mother of five.  What’s not hard?  Actually, the hardest part is probably being perpetually yelled at by the three-year-old.  He’s getting better, but still . . . it wears on me.

When are you most relaxed?:
I’m not telling.

When are you most stressed?:
When I’m being yelled at by one child while the others are being noisy.  I have noise tolerance issues I guess.

What can you not live without?:
My devastatingly handsome husband.

Do you agree or disagree about the recent article that reported blogs are authored by narcissists:
I agree and disagree.  Let’s face it, we’re all narcissistic to one degree or another anyway.

Why do you blog?:
It is the one thing I get to do that is purely for me, and I’ve always loved writing anyway.  I guess that means I’m one of those narcissists then, huh?

Edited to Add: I was supposed to tag people!  People who are not me!  How typical of narcissistic bloggers to forget the other people.  For one of the memes I’m supposed to just tag five people.  For the other one I am apparently supposed to tag people from different categories (new bloggers who need traffic, bloggers I’d like to get to know better, bloggers I don’t think will actually do the meme, etc.).  Being the narcissist that I apparently am, however, I’m making up my own rules.  I am going to close my eyes and scroll through my Google Reader account and randomly click five times.  Whatever blogs I hit, that’s who I’m tagging.  Ready?  Drumroll please . . . (see, very narcissistic) . . .

1.Voices for Vietnam Adoption Integrity *snort* like they do memes
2. Michelle, like she has nothing better to do
3. B.  Will somebody give her her referral already?
4. Our Little Springroll  I am embarrassed to admit how far behind I am on this blog since she changed blogs and I forgot to update my Google account.
5. Fleas Biting Again with the blog that isn’t an appropriate forum for memes.  What is up with my blind clicking finger?  But, alas, rules are rules, even if I did make them up.

Okay, if you’ve been tagged you can pick either meme or do them both.  Because it’s my rules now, and I say so, narcissist that I am.

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