Mormonless Monday

Okay, I know it’s been a few weeks since I’ve actually done a Mormon Monday post, but I posted about church yesterday and I want to talk about something else today, so I’m just going to count yesterday as this week’s Mormon Monday on a Sunday and move on.

All two of my readers who actually look forward to Mormon Monday will forgive me, right?  No?!?  Then next Monday I guess I’ll talk about forgiveness.  There’s a topic for you.

Fine, I’ll give a brief summary of my marathon talk and then move on:

Ways That Serving Others Can Bless Our Lives

In a nutshell, serving others blesses our lives because it how we learn to be more Christ like.  Sure, we can hear about how we should be, but service helps us experience it and feel it and, hopefully, internalize it so that it’s part of who we are.  The lessons of service are the blessings of service.  Here are some lessons I’ve learned over the years as I’ve served others (not perfected, just learned):

  1. Serving others helps us get outside of ourselves and put our own problems either into perspective or out of our minds.
  2. Service isn’t service if we are doing what we think needs to be done to help someone without taking the time to find out if it is actually helpful to that someone.
  3. Our job is not to judge. Our job is just to serve.
  4. The most important service we can ever provide is within the walls of our own home.
  5. Part of providing service within the walls of our home is providing service without the walls of our home. We teach by example.

And here’s a little quote  from an April 1990 conference address in which Elder Derek A. Cuthbert of The Seventy said:

Over the years, many people, especially youth, have asked me, “Elder Cuthbert, how can I become more spiritual?” My reply has always been the same: “You need to give more service.”

Service changes people. It refines, purifies, gives a finer perspective, and brings out the best in each one of us. It gets us looking outward instead of inward. It prompts us to consider others’ needs ahead of our own. Righteous service is the expression of true charity, such as the Savior showed.

Okay, are both of you happy now?

Moving on.

Tank Boy just came up to me out of the blue and said, “I wish I had a white face like yours, not a brown face.  My face is a brown face.”

Reason number 10,568 why I wish we hadn’t moved:  we had a really nice group of adoptive families back home that we hung out with on a fairly regular basis.  All of the adopted children are Korean, and one of the dads is Korean-American.  There are lots of brown faces like his.

“Why do you want a white face?” I asked.  “You have such a beautiful brown face.”

“I know,” he said, “but I want a white face because you have a white face.”

I’m sensing the beginning of a new leg of our adoption journey.

You think?!?

And George . . .

6 thoughts on “Mormonless Monday

  1. Well, I don’t have anything particularly useful to contribute but ouch on the Tank Boy comment and ouch on having 10,000+ reasons you wish you hadn’t moved. Maybe it’s good Tank Boy made the comment so at least you know it’s bothering him and you can work on it?

    And congrats on the speaking going so well yesterday!


  2. Wow. I think I’ve mentioned this before, but N~ has never commented on the fact that he is different from us. He’ll identify with black characters, and say his brothers are the white characters, but he’s never asked us about being different, or said that he wishes he looked like us.


  3. Well, just looking for a bright side but at least he said “I know” when you said his brown face is beautiful…so unless that was just lip service, he gets that he’s gorgeous as-is, just wants to be gorgeous in a different way sometimes?


  4. It’s so hard to hear our kids wanting to be something different than they are. We love them as they are and wish they could, too. With a houseful of girls, I hear comments like that alot–not adoption related which has it’s own set of issues attached–and it’s tough to know how much acknowledging, sympathizing, and rebutting to do.


  5. Bless his sweet sweet soul. I’ll bet your heart just crumbled when he said that. I know mine would.

    Little Boy G once said to me, “Mommy? My eyes are little. And your eyes are big. And Daddy’s eyes are big.” I said, heart breaking, “Yeah, sweetie. My eyes are green. Daddy’s eyes are blue. And yours are brown. Isn’t that neat? We have all the colors that eyes can be in our family!” He smiled and nodded, but I’ll never forget it. I think someone in his daycare (the meanest boy ever who also told LBG that I wasn’t his real mother and that I was too old to be a mom anyway) had said something to him. The meanest boy ever was eventually asked to leave the school, but still. LBG hasn’t brought it up since. We have no Korean families, adopted or otherwise, around here, but he does have Asian kids in his daycare, two who are adopted. So that helps to some extent. Please hug your sweet boy for me. They are all so perfect as they are. Our kids.


  6. Carissa

    Oh the joy of what I have to look forward to, I hope that you are able to talk it out with Tank boy and I agree that it is a good thing that he said something to you at least.


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