Phullabaloney Friday: My! Word! People!

Okay, I almost titled this post “Cooters and Beavers and Groundhogs, Oh My!” but I was afraid the beaver reference was a little over the top, especially for a polite Mormon girl.

At any rate, I absolutely had never ever, in my entire almost 38 years on this planet, heard of female parts being called a cooter.  Now, not only does the mind boggle further at the thought of a cooter slushin’ in the bed of the truck, the stomach heaves just a tiny bit as well.  Thanks 🙂 .

In my mind, the term Cooter is a direct reference to a Duke’s of Hazzard character who pretty much embodied the unbathed, uneducated, though happy-go-lucky nature of my high school boyfriend.  Well, my high school boyfriend did bathe, but he usually had a Marlboro hanging out the corner of his mouth and pronounced “Chevy” “Chivy”, so you get the idea.  And when I refer to my hometown (as in where I mostly grew up, not the place I moved from this past spring)  as Cooterville, what have you all been thinking I meant?  A town full of . . . umm . . . easy access or something?  Okay, not that you can’t get plenty of easy access there (the highest teen pregnancy rate in the county) if that’s your thing, but really?  Is that what you’ve been thinking?

Oh my.

Also, you might be interested to know that I have gotten many, many hits on my blog today from people looking for the lyrics to the song I was referencing in last night’s post.  And? most of them are searching for “cooler slushing” so I am not the only one who is having a difficult time with the Cootervillian Twang interpretation and translation.

Aside from the horror that you all apparently think I come from a town of female genitalia, I have been really loving your comments.

I am familiar with the badonkadonk song.  I actually saw it preformed on live television a few years back and kept thinking, “How can a man with pants that tight have a voice that low?”

I also have an affinity for that Carrie Underwood song and am grateful it wasn’t around to inspire me when the Cooter boyfriend and I broke up.  Though the girls he dated after me could undoubtedly do shots of whiskey.

I did(n’t) take Lawmommy’s advice and I immediately looked up the term “cooter” on Urbandictionary.com after reading her comments and . . . gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I mean, I know people can be crass at times, but gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just two more things and then I’ll end our session for today.

First, my current favorite country song:

Next:

Colleen had a question for Phullabaloney Fill, who says it is about @%&!!*! time someone remembered not only his existence, but his great talent as well.

In case you don’t follow Colleen’s blog, she has been waiting 112 days now for her 1600 approval.  She is still waiting for the field investigation to be done for her daughter’s case, and she asked if it would be happening soon.

Mr. Fill says:

Fill

Start packing your bags!  No shadow, so good news!!!

So tell me, if you haven’t already, what is your favorite country song and why?

And George, if you’re out there, Tewt the Newt says hello.

16 thoughts on “Phullabaloney Friday: My! Word! People!

  1. Carolyn

    I feel a lot better now that I have been vindicated by the masses 🙂 I wasn’t the ONLY one out there thinking about a hoo-ha when you posted that song.

    Like

  2. Carolyn

    Oh, and here’s some country lyrics you might enjoy:

    WELL, I WAS DRUNK THE DAY MY MOM GOT OUT OF PRISON
    AND I WENT TO PICK HER UP IN THE RAIN
    BUT BEFORE I COULD GET TO THE STATION IN MY PICKUP TRUCK
    SHE GOT RUNNED OVER BY A DAMNED OLD TRAIN

    AND I’LL HANG AROUND AS LONG AS YOU WILL LET ME
    AND I NEVER MINDED STANDIN’ IN THE RAIN
    NO, A’ YOU DON’T HAVE TO CALL ME DARLIN’, DARLIN’
    YOU NEVER EVEN CALL ME
    WELL I WONDER WHY YOU DON’T CALL ME
    WHY DON’T YOU EVER CALL ME BY MY NAME

    Like

  3. Yeah, I had thought about commenting on the cooter thing, but after describing my son’s need for a surgical consult the other day, I thought it best to pretend to be prim. 😉

    As far as your nickname for my town–did I ever tell you that the first time that Sean was invited to go someplace in the town you just left, he thought that the guy was making some crass joke? Because, well, you know…

    Like

  4. I really did hestitate before writing my last comment, because I didn’t want to drag your blog down into the mud (and I did actually look up the multiple meanings of “cooter” just to make sure I wasn’t delusional in my thinking). The funny thing is, whenever you’ve referred to Cooterville, my mind never went to the naughty parts – just exactly what you meant by it, I guess more or less redneck, is that ok to say? But in reading the lyrics, my first instinct was naughty parts, don’t know why. I was a bit shocked you were going there, until I read further and realized it was just me (though I guess, glad it wasn’t just me???). All in all, the lyrics are cracking me up.

    Glad Phil is back, kinda been missing him and his girlfriend/partner in crime. Hope he’s right on this one.

    Like

  5. Colleen

    OK, 3 things:

    1. I have to tell you that this post and the last one are the only things that have actually made me laugh out loud since May. Literally and truly laugh. I so needed that. Thanks, even if you didn’t realize cooter could also mean well… you know.

    2 I LOVE FILL. He has not failed me yet and I promise to bring him a nice present from Vietnam if he is right.

    3. If I have to pick my favoite country lyrics it is also “You never even called me by my name” verse that Carolyn listed above. I love it because it makes me think of my GA friends and if you listen to the whole song it is actually making fun of typical country songs. Since that is taken I wil have to go with “Who I Am”

    “I am Rosemary’s granddaughter
    The spitting image of my father
    And when the day is done
    My mommas still my biggest fan
    Sometimes Im clueless and Im clumsy
    But Ive got friends that love me
    And they know just where I stand
    Its all a part of me
    And thats who I am”

    That one is for obvious reasons

    Colleen aka Rosemary’s granddaughter and mother. º¿º

    Like

  6. Lilola

    When my baby girl went away to college (20 years ago) she came home having learned 2 things. Burping on cue and loving country music. I was horrified by both!! Oh, the humanity!
    But I’ve learned to love country music because I can listen to nice people singing about nice things. Although the funny lyrics are a hoot! Must be from Hooterville! LOL

    My favorite “My Front Porch Looking In”

    The only ground I ever owned was sticking to my shoes
    Now I look at my front porch and this panoramic view
    I can sit and watch the fields fill up
    With rays of glowing sun
    Or watch the moon lay on the fences
    Like that’s where it was hung
    My blessings are in front of me
    It’s not about the land
    I’ll never beat the view
    From my front porch looking in

    There’s a carrot top who can barely walk
    With a sippy cup of milk
    A little blue eyed blonde with shoes on wrong
    ‘Cause she likes to dress herself
    And the most beautiful girl holding both of them
    And the view I love the most
    Is my front porch looking in, yeah

    I’ve traveled here and everywhere
    Following my job
    I’ve seen the paintings from the air
    Brushed by the hand of God
    The mountains and the canyons reach from sea to shining sea
    But I can’t wait to get back home
    To the one he made for me
    It’s anywhere I’ll ever go and everywhere I’ve been
    Nothing takes my breath away
    Like my front porch looking in

    There’s a carrot top who can barely walk
    With a sippy cup of milk
    A little blue eyed blonde with shoes on wrong
    ‘Cause she likes to dress herself
    And the most beautiful girl holding both of them
    Yeah the view I love the most
    Is my front porch looking in

    I see what beautiful is about
    When I’m looking in
    Not when I’m looking out

    Like

  7. metaphase

    Oh, this is THE funniest “conversation” I’ve been a part of in a long time! I must admit, my mind was in the gutter for the song, but it wasn’t when you referred to where you lived. Strange.

    Like

  8. Just so you know where I stand with the word cooter, I have never known it used the way you used it, only known it as another word for your who-ha.

    My favorite country songs are Nobody Wins by Radney Foster, all songs by Keith Urban, and all songs by Jack Ingram. I am also a huge Willie Nelson fan. I love old school country and the country from today that is more rockin.

    I have thoroughly enjoyed this conversation. Made me really laugh.

    Like

  9. thebenshow

    I almost made the same comment about Cooter! I also love the Dixie Chicks. I recommend the Loretta Lynn album she did a couple of years ago with Jack White of The White Stripes (Van Lear Rose). I enjoy Julie Roberts and my husband and I still rock out to Johnny Cash’s Folsom Prison LIVE album.

    Like

  10. It would have to be Randy Travis’ Forever and Ever, Amen. It’s just such a sweet song about a husband who promises to love his wife forever, and ever. So sweet! I love Randy!

    Like

  11. I’m in love with all things Lyle Lovett…country(ish) but so insidiously funny. The jokes sneak up on you and you realize you’ve been singing along without getting it, but when you get it…oh, Lyle. Marry me.

    For example, lyrics from my favorite “Give back my heart:”

    …So I stopped of in this little cowboy-looking bar,
    Walked on through the door and she just smiled.
    With a long ponytail and pretty white dress,
    She said “Hi! Bullriders do it best.”
    And I said “Oh my God, what’s your name? My name’s Lyle.”

    And I said “Oh, give back my heart, chip-kicking redneck woman,
    Take your boots and walk out of my life.”
    And I said “Oh, give back my heart, chip-kicking redneck woman,
    I can’t be no cowgirl paradise.”

    (and then later, the refrain):

    “Redneck-ness has got to be a disease…
    You catch it on your fingers and it just crawls right up your sleeve.”

    OR

    “If I Had A Boat,” or “Angel in Distress” (with the great lyric “I don’t love you any less, but I can’t love you any more.”) , or “Don’t touch my hat” about the epic love between a cowboy and his…well, his hat (the refrain: “You can have my girl, but don’t touch my hat.”)

    Seriously, if you don’t already love him you must let me make you a disk.

    Like

  12. Not big on country. Though my mom raised me on John Denver – does he count?

    Hey, I have a question for Phil… Will we sell our house in the next month? (PLEASE?!!)

    Like

  13. Lilola

    Doesn’t it make you wonder? If Cooter refers to you-know, What were the writers of “The Dukes of Hazzard” thinking when they named that character Cooter???????????????

    Like

  14. The song Colleen posted is one of my favs. The other, if you can forgive a good Mormon girl for liking it, is Beer Run by Todd Snider.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run
    B-double E double R U-N beer run

    all we need is a ten and five-er,
    a car and key and a sober driver.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run

    A couple of frat guys from Abilene
    drove out all night to see Robert Earl Keen
    at the KPIG Swine and Sworea Dance.
    They wore baseball caps and khaki pants.
    They wanted cigarettes, so to save a little money they bought one off this hippie that smelled kinda funny.
    And next thing they knew they were both pretty hungry and pretty thirsty too

    B-double E double R U-N beer run
    B-double E double R U-N beer ru-unn

    All we need is a ten and five-er,
    car and key and an able driver.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run

    They found a store with a sign that said
    their beer was coldest.
    So they sent in Brad ’cause he looked the oldest.
    He got a case of beer and a candy bar, walked over to where all the registers are
    laid his fake I.D. on the counter top.
    The clerk looked, and turned to look back up and stopped.
    He said “Son, I ain’t gonna call the cops, but I’m gonna have to keep this card”
    the guys both took it pretty hard.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run
    B-double E double R U-N beer ru-un

    oh how happy we would be-
    had we only brought a better fake I.D.

    B-double E double R U-N-beer run

    They met another old hippie named
    Sleepy John, claimed to be the one from the Robert Earl song.
    So they gave him all their cash-he bought em some brews.
    Was a beautiful day out in Santa Cruz
    They were feelin’ so good it shoulda been a crime.
    The crowd was cool, and the band was prime.
    They made it back up front to their seats just in time to they could sing with all their friends “the road goes on forever
    and the party never ends”.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run

    all we need is a ten and a five-er
    car and key and a sober driver.

    B-double E double R U-N beer run
    B-double E double R U-N beer run

    Like

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