Gah! That title would sound so much better if my husband’s name were Artie, or Kevin, or Bob. Or even David. Because then it would be Artie the Assembler or Kevin the Constructor or, you know, Bob the Builder. Or even David the Designer.
But his name is Matt (which is a nice name – I mean, no offense to all the Kevins and Arties out there, or the Bobs and the Davids, but I’m rather fond of Matt), so I’ll just have to go with Matt the maker. Even though it makes it sound like he out trying to pick up chicks or something. Isn’t that what on the make means? Maybe not. I’m not really up on the lingo for such things.
Anyway, that is really, most definitely, not what he is doing (even though he could easily find younger and hotter women than I to fall all over him).
He has, however, designed a . . . umm . . . swing set for the kids. He had lumber and other supplies delivered two weeks ago. He has, time and weather permitting, been working on it (with copious amounts of help from my also-handy father) since.
I think I need to back up a bit. We have been talking all winter about building swing set for the kids this year since it didn’t get done last year. We have debated buying them the same one we had at our old house. We have looked at many, many other options online. My husband has been researching, debating, comparing and contrasting off and on for months. A few weeks ago he emailed me a spreadsheet, A Spreadsheet! of all the options. Call me uncaring or unfeeling if you wish, but once we get to the point of doing A Spreadsheet! on all the options and expenses of the various swing sets, my brain shuts down. I told him I was fine with any of them and to please just choose one (see? at least I’m not terribly picky).
So he made a choice. He decided to go with his own design. He is quite the handy hottie, that husband of mine.
Now the kids are asking when their park will be finished. No, I am not hyperbolizing (for once). Tank Boy actually asked me when his park will be finished.
So far it has rings.
A tube slide (unless you are Tank Boy, and then it’s Tuba Slide) is still waiting to be attached (as are the other two non-tuba slides).
There will also be: a baby swing, a disc swing, a tire swing, monkey bars, and a punching bag; six platforms, three roofs, and a bridge. Am I forgetting anything? Oh, a sandbox or three.
So far it looks like this (especially when you are standing in my bathtub to better look out the window) (why do people put huge picture windows right above the bathtub?):
All six towers will have platforms. The three taller ones in the back will be roofed. There will be a bridge connecting the front and back middle towers. I don’t pretend to remember where everything else will go, just that none of the slides will be going toward the pond.
So, yeah, for Easter? My kids are apparently getting a park.
But they are not getting cell phones until they can pay for them themselves! And no cars for their 16th birthdays! And they will continue to wear clearance jeans from Target (until they start going to school)! We will not spoil our children. Will not!
Party at my house this summer, anyone?