Friday I got up on the horse without the help of a mounting block (read: horsey step stool for the short or inept rider). I managed this feat in jeans that have no Lycra. This, I think, is my biggest accomplishment of the month.
Yesterday I attended a fashion show put on by the local historical society. This means, of course, almost all of the models are either the right age, or too old, to be my mother. Oddly enough, I want some of the clothes I saw anyway. I think this means I need to have a mid-life crisis or something, but I wouldn’t know where to begin. It at least means I really need to stop living in yoga and/or lounge pants. On the up side, I won a door prize at the fashion show, so I now have a gift certificate to a jewelry store. Score! I never win door prizes. Never. So to get one for jewelry? Wow. Maybe my mid-life crisis starts with some gold hoops.
After being inspired by The Very Old Ladies of Unpopulated County to dress better and accessorize more (the humiliation I am feeling for even typing that!), I told my husband I need to either get serious about dropping 10 pounds so I can fit into the nice clothes I already have, or I need to go shopping. Then I expressed my inclination towards the former rather than the latter.
“I’m good with that!” he said with enthusiasm.
Did I mention the complete LACK of LYCRA in my jeans?
He claims he meant he is good with the idea of me not spending money. I told him no man who was raised with five sisters has any excuse for that kind of verbiage faux pas.
If he really wants to make it up to me, he will buy me this jacket from Coldwater Creek for my upcoming birthday:
Of course, I don’t know what size to tell him to get it in. You know, because of my massive rib cage and all, sometimes I need jackets a size bigger than I normally wear. On the other hand, because of my complete lack of boobs, I sometimes need jackets in a size smaller than I normally wear. Clothing sizes are about as helpful as trigonometry.
Tomorrow I am going shopping for boots and jewelry.
And George, if you’re out there, Tewt the Newt is going shopping tomorrow, too.