Dear . . . Week of Christmas

Dear Children,

When I say, “Look at the camera!” what I really mean is, “Look. at. the FREAKING. CAMERA!”  This should not be so difficult, especially for those of you older than the age of two.  And really, super especially for those of you older than the age of eight.  This is not rocket science, but it is only four days before Christmas and I haven’t gotten my cards out yet because I haven’t been able to get ONE. SINGLE. DECENT. PHOTO. of all five of you . . . ummm . . . EVER.


Dear Midge,

I realize that going down the slide face first and landing in the snow face up under the German shepherd, who is knocked off his feet by your descent and therefore sits on your aforementioned face, is not a pleasant situation.  However, it is most unladylike to go running through the yard expectorating and yelling, “My spit tastes like dog butt!  My spit tastes like dog butt!!!!”


Dear McH,

Two of the worst migraines I’ve had in years in less than a week is really not at all how I intended to spend the first half of everybody’s Christmas break.  Thank you for your compassion and understanding, thank you for the emergency run to the Quik Mart for caffeine, and thank you for baking Christmas cookies with the kids when I couldn’t.

Dear People at Coldwater Creek,

I have been told that you are an old lady store after all.  But?  I couldn’t help myself.  Your 50% off everything site wide sale sucked. me. in.  (Sale continues through Dec. 26 or 27 for you other old ladies out there, then it picks up in stores only on Dec. 26 and goes through Jan. 3.  Just sayin’).

Dear Fellow Bloggers,

The holidays and five kids have kept me from my appointed blog reading rounds for a while now so, since I haven’t been able to drop by and say it on each of your blogs individually, Merry Christmas (or) Happy Hanukah!

And George, if you’re out there, Tewt the Newt says Merry Christmas!

5 thoughts on “Dear . . . Week of Christmas

  1. “My spit tastes like dog butt!” – please thank Midge for making me laugh hysterically tonight. Or, maybe you don’t want her to know you shared? In that case, Thank YOU for sharing! Merry Christmas to you and yours. 🙂


  2. Oh, Midge, how I love you. You bring me smiles whenever I need them most! As for a Christmas card, hey, I’ve got a few I’m still waiting on and a few I’m still sending (yours is on the way) and why not spread out the joy of the season by receiving them over a longer time span, right? I know you’re not the only one having timing challenges this year.


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