Well, it’s all over the news this morning. I mean, if you consider several southwestern Ohio Facebook friends to be purveyors of the news (and of course I do), then it is all over the news.
Touchdown Jesus, Big Butter Jesus, Drowning Jesus, whatever you want to call him, is gone.
(If you don’t know what I’m talking about, watch this tutorial video):
Last night Big Butter Jesus was struck by lightning.
I am not even making that up.
Reports are pretty clear that he burned rather than melted.
In a Springfield News-Sun article, one gawker who came out to watch Jesus burn was reported as saying,
“It sent goosebumps through my whole body because I am a believer. Of all the things that could have been struck, I just think that that would be protected. … It’s something that’s not supposed to happen, Jesus burning. I had to see it with my own eyes.”
Dear Gawker: That wasn’t really Jesus burning. It was a statue.
I thought his reaction was interesting because, you see, I, too, am a believer. I believe in lots of things, like phonics and gravity, wind and magnetism, and, yes, Jesus. And? Being a believer? My first thought years and years ago was, “Who builds a ginormous statue of Jesus that makes it look like He is drowning in a pond? Everybody knows Jesus walked on water.”
So when I awoke today to the flurry of Facebook “R.I.P. Big Butter Jesus” messages, my reaction was sheer and utter surprise that it took this long for that thing to be struck by lightening.
Honestly, it was something like six stories high (not making that up) and framed in steel, so it was pretty much one, big faux oleo lightning rod (two if you count each arm as its own separate rod).
Rest in peace, Touchdown Jesus, and may that church use whatever insurance money they get from your loss to help succor the weak, clothe the naked, feed the hungry, give hope to the downtrodden and strengthen the feeble knees. Because then your existence will have been good for more than a laugh.
THIS JUST IN:
Edited to add some eyewitness video